21st Century Nursery Rhymes 3

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 13

Christmas is coming, the Geese are getting fat
The bird is a little fatty but I don’t mind that
If you haven’t got a Goose then a Turkey will do
If you haven’t got a Turkey, I’m not dining with you

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 14

Jack and Jill
Went up the hill
They took with them a bucket
Jack made a play
Jill said “no way”
So he said to himself “oh bother”

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 15

Jack and Jill
Went up the hill
And planned to do some snogging.
But on the way
They met Ray
And spent the afternoon dogging

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 16

Jack asked Jill
Are you on the pill?
As I have no form of protection
Jill looked grim
Then said to him
Where he could stick his erection

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 17

A diller, a dollar, a 10 o'clock scholar,
What makes you arrive so late
It’s no good arriving at 10 o'clock
You’re Headmaster for goodness sake

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 18

There was a little girl,
Who had a little curl,
Growing in the middle of her chest
With the sunlight on her
It looked like a comma
That punctuated her pert little breasts

(Little girl in this case refers to stature and not age, so stop composing a complaint already)

(Not really a nursery rhyme I know. So sorry to the fans of Longfellow)

21st CENTURY NURSERY RHYMES # 19

A diller, a dollar, a 10 o'clock scholar,
What makes you come so soon?
Just think about cricket the next time
that we get down to it in my room