Funny Christmas Poems 2

A further selection of funny Christmas poems by Paul Curtis. Covering topics as varied as a feminist retelling of the nativity story, festive binge drinking and dealing sensitively with turkeycide, the feast of Christmas is dissected with an extremely blunt scalpel.

Christmas Cheer

A Christmas Day visit to the pub leaves the protagonist in the proverbial doghouse.

Christmas Post

Confusion reigns at the post office when Mildred tries to buy her Christmas stamps.

Shop Early For Christmas

Christmas is the period of goodwill, but will the Judge accept the accused's novel excuse for his misdeeds?

Christmas Service

Wise words from a country dweller confound the vicar who is only too willing to duck his Christmas morning service.

Three Wise Ones

An alternative view of the nativity story delivered with a feminist twist.

Plastic Christmas

Spend, Spend, Spend... The first lines of a contemporary Christmas carol.

A Mother's Christmas Tale

An overworked mother's plea for a little peace and goodwill at Christmas.

Full Of The Christmas Spirit

A poem extolling the virtues of a most bibulous Christmas Day.

Preparing The Bird

A twisted funny poem about the trials and tribulations of preparing your Christmas turkey.

While Brokers Watched Their Stock By Night

A deliciously funny parody which intertwines the Square Mile, the banking crisis and a vengeful angel.

Merry Christmas Sir

A poem which will strike a chord with anyone who has their newspaper delivered by a paperboy / papergirl / paperperson, or more likely these days, a paperOAP.

Scrooge And Grinch

A poem which brings together the two great misanthropes of the festive period.

Twas The Night Before Christmas # 1

A parody of the poem 'Twas the Night before Christmas' which reaches a particularly cruel conclusion.

It’s Christmas When

Cute and cuddly, light and fluffy, this poem distills the spirit of Christmas and offers a welcome relief after the earlier misanthropic offerings.

Funny Christmas Poems 1 | 2 | 3 | 4

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