Dirty Christmas Poems II

A second collection of dirty funny Christmas poems by contemporary English poet Paul Curtis. From condoms and cocaine snorting to hand jobs and hairy nipples, you'll find a riot of funny filthy poems to help you survive the festive period.

Tied Up With Tinsel

And if dressing up isn't enough, you could try a little light bondage as well.

I Saw a Figure on the Stair

Or perhaps a little undressing up, which can be equally titillating.

Christmas Spice

More of the same, for those who view Christmas as a saucy interlude rather than a sacred festival.

The Office Christmas Party

There are many dangers to be encountered at a typical office party, but some are truly horrific.

Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer

This snorter of a funny Christmas poem reveals the rather unsavoury reason behind Rudolph the Reindeer's perpetually red nose.

Rudolph the Rampant

A funny poem for Christmas about Rudolph the Reindeer, who has an insatiable and completely indiscriminate sexual appetite.

Santa’s Little Helper

A funny dirty poem about a sexy santa outfit which promises to be extremely dirty, but ends up being unexpectly clean.

For Whom The Bell Tolls

Campanologists, vicars and a little ding-a-ling are all the ingredients you need for a cracker of a Christmas poem.

Christmas Turkey

A dirty Christmas poem which features additional twists and turns which elevate this poem above your average 'stuffing the turkey' poetic fare.

Everyone in the Grotto Knows

A funny poem about Santa's little bit on the side.

Santa’s R & R

There's no stopping Santa when he returns to the North Pole after his Christmas Eve exertions, desperate to get his paws on Mrs Claus. Well, almost no stopping him!