There was a young lady called Wendy,
Who legs were exceptionally bendy,
But she could boil up a brew
Or a hot chicken stew,
Whilst looking exceptionally trendy.
Now one day on the range
She was looking quite strange,
But feeling exceptionally randy,
When she met Martin Amis,
That dirty old shamus,
And took him a glass of beer shandy.
He looked at her boobs,
Felt stirs in his tubes,
Cried, By Gad, you make me quite horny!
Then he whipped out a dick
The size of a stick
And Wendy stripped off and got porny.
And now they have twins
And green wheely bins
And they live in Saint Taffeta-Movril,
But when they feel randy
And want to drink shandy,
They quaff endless beakers of Bovril.
Copyright © Max Scratchmann. All Rights Reserved